Suddenly, I arrived,
pockets turned inside out and carrying
the doubts stuffed there in front of me
like an alterboy with cupped, raw hands---
hands better at kneading bread, shoulders, thighs.

At night, I slept with the blanket over my head
to keep off the mosquitos, but maybe
I should have allowed myself
to be hunted hard.
Looked at things
like they looked first.

I dash my face with the water
gathering in my palms, and
envision the thin line of silk
running between our eyes
jumps and catches
in the morning light.